happy yet unsure

After a week or two, i met her again in the online chat.
As usual i made the first move by saying ''hey''.
well for this week, i tried to push everything a little more than before.
i even tried to ask her out for an unofficial date.
''a meal or two'' thats the thing i mentioned.
kinda realized a lill stupid to say that. haha but i dont care.
It seems that she did'nt reject me straight away.
Instead, she asked ''when??''

Lots of stuff came into my mind lately.
Like : '' am i doing the right thing ?'' & '' am i ready for it ?''
i get really confusing at times, dont know what is the right thing to say about
or even what is the right thing to express through speaking.
as some said, communication problem?
I know myself pretty well, as not the kind who talks smart but
more to the kind of person to do it.

At the same time,
im afraid deep within me, and afraid that someone to reach out
and lend a hand to pull me out from this deep hole.
im sinking yet not noticing.
everytime you did'nt give a specific answer, which makes me
think lots of stuff.
many said, just let it be and go with the flow.
Before i go with the flow?
i wanna know where i stand ? deep down in your heart or
even in your life?
By expectation,
your family comes first, therefore career and then your friends :)
i aint sure you want to be in a relationship,
but that does'nt mean i cant wait.
i just need a specific answer so i know who i am to you.
just want to say im not desperate or anything, just
to be sure about things in my life,
and also getting to know you better.

i hope i really can do it.
After two weeks from now, i most probably will be taking you out for a meal or two?
or it may not happen at all ?
if it really happens,
i really wish that everything goes well.
it depends on how we progress weekly.
Been missing you day by day.
wondering how are you doing, i know you're busy
therefore i did'nt want to text you.
But if you need a someone to talk to ?
i wont mind to be the one to do it :)

lastly, i wish you good luck and all the best in your exams